Friday started off a lil weird... I woke up early all happy then my dad took so long to get ready for work so he made me a few minutes late for my doctor appointment. I hate when other people make me late because I'm the one that looks bad. I almost had a freakin panic attack while my dad was driving. Err I hate being in the car with him...Mr Road Rage!! I talked to my doctor for 30 minutes. I was actually kind of comfortable with her, my other doctors are kinda weird so I don't feel like talking. She said I seem normal so I don't need to go back to see her unless I feel like I want to. Well when I think about it, I'd rather go talk to one of my close friends since its FREE!! If I go see her it's $200 for 30 mins. I think thats the work field I should study. =)

     Justin came over and we went shopping. I bought a red Famous Stars & Straps shirt to match with my red chucks and a skirt. Justin bought a whole new outfit for later on that night. We ate at Sam Woo and then did a few errands. We went back to my house to get ready for the Hoobastank concert. OMG we looked sooo cute all punked out. We had so much fun at the concert. The mosh pit got crazy so the bouncers got down in the crowd and were making sure it didn't get too big. The bouncers stood in front of me and justin so we didnt get hurt.  Phantom Planet performed that O.C. song....the lead singer looked like Ashton Kutcher. Then Hoobastank came out...the lead singer Doug Robb looked soooooooooo damn fine. I've never seen a person look that good in person compared to their pics. After a song or two he took off his shirt....my eyes were glued to him the whole time. While drooling haha Justin and I noticed some girls who looked around 12-15 that kept getting pushed by the mosh pit so we grabbed them and put them in front of us so they wouldnt get hurt. They were so cute..they jus stood there afraid of everyone so we kinda protected them. Justin was tellin them push people back and pull their hair LoLs it was sooo funny. There were quite a few cute white guys there. Hmmm I think I'm getting back into all that. Hoobastank put on a great show.... all of us had so much fun.

 Justin and I went to tea planet after and sat for a while. We ended up going to Cue D's to see who was there. We knew almost everyone so we jus chilled for a while. After all the shit that I've done this week like getting high and passing out at the lab, I know I should be good and not do anything stupid. Well, Chris offered me his corona and i turned it down...but I didnt turn down the bacardi 151. Then everyone was out in the parking lot drinking, so i drank some mickeys. We all decided to go to Del Taco and ended up posting up there and talking until 3am when everyone decided to go home.  That night ended up being the most fun I've had in so long. I wish I could rewind and do it all over. Next concert is Usher, Mase, and Kanye West.

Heres a pic of Doug Robb....he is sooooo freakin sexy in person!! ::::drools::::

Thursday wasn't a good day. This is from my blog on myspace.

Passing out once AGAIN!! =(

I went to the lab this morning to get blood work done because my doctor wanted to see if there's something else wrong with me. I've been putting it off for a few weeks now because I'm afraid of needles. The lady calls me in the room and starts pullin all these viles off the wall and I asked her "you're gonna fill up all of them!?!?" she said yeah and said dont worry. She stuck the needle in my arm and started fillin up all SIX of the viles and I sat there trying to be calm because I know im tiny so I have a chance of passing out from having so much blood taken. She finishes and tells me I'm all done and can go. I walked out to the waiting room where my mom was sitting and I sat down and told her wait a few minutes because I'm feeling light headed. I knew I was gonna black out, I can always feel it coming. I thought I could brush it off like usual, but then I woke up to a lot of people standing around me and staring. The nurses ran out and were holding that stuff that makes people wake up when they pass out. Of course the first thing that went thru my mind was, "is that food she's holding to my face?!?" hahaha...I was hungry plus when you give blood they give you something sweet to get the blood circulating so I thought that's what it was. My mom said i started going into convulsions and was out for a few minutes. They put me in a wheelchair and took me in the back to lay down. In the back I got sick and had to run to the bathroom to throw up. Blah...bad day! I layed down in the back til I was sure I wouldnt drop to the floor like last time. I kind of felt stupid when I was walking out cuz everyone was staring at me asking if I was okay. I guess next time I have to let them know I have a blacking out problem. At least this time I kind of knew it was coming and sat down first. Last time I hit the wall and tile floor so hard that I was in pain for a week or two. The nurse should have known it would happen, that's a lot of blood to be taken from someone my size and especially when I was told NOT to eat from 10 hours before.

         On Sunday my parents and I went to Utah. We were driving and I was staring out the window and the next thing out of my mouth was "OoOoh a mall!!" LoLs. I ended up spending a lot of money...err. I need to stop...everytime I go I spend a few hundred...damnit. I have soo much clothes and shoes...funny thing is I wear the same shit. I have favorites...so a lot of stuff still has tags or still in shoe boxes.

       I took a lil nap then called up Rob....the first thing he said was "hey my neighbors tree is on fire" when i asked him if he called the fire department he said "Oh..i dont know" LoLs WTF!!! I got ready and then went there but all the excitement was done. We lit some fireworks, ate, and everyone else drank....i brought a big bottle of mailbu rum and 2 bottles of sprite..but i really dont feel like drinking anymore. I was craving starbucks at 12 I made everyone go to nyny. The line was sooo freakin long...but i still wanted my drink. A few people met us up there...we jus sat and made fun of people as they walked by.

      Guys are so full of shit lols.. hahaha. or maybe jus one in particular. I finally realized im jus better off alone...guys lie too much. It's to the point where I wonder if they know they're even lying. If you're gonna spit game and talk your shit...then make sure you don't get caught on something and look stupid. I think lower of the person every single day...jus be real....fuck how many time do i gotta say it!! Sometimes people take things so far that I jus give up already..no point in lettin shit get me mad..plus i really dont know what is the truth anymore. I'm prolly gettin recycled words haha. I have those moments where I jus wanna throw everything out there and make this person feel dumb, but hey..if you wanna tell me lies then i must not mean anything to you cuz you cant be honest..so why should I say what I know. The sad thing is I feel hella guilty when I try to be mean...he doesn't deserve me being nice to him. I don't even know if I can be friends with this person cuz friends don't lie to each other....and if he doesn't respect me enough to tell the truth, then whatevers. Err..so tired of the bullshit.

         I talked to that guy from cali the other day and he was tellin me he's gonna move here in January and hes like..you excited...so we gonna be together.. ahaha OMG HELL NO!! Sorry if you think there is still something there, but I don't feel the same way. I told him i was moving away LoLs..hahaha i was jus kidding tho. There's nothing wrong with him, he's really cute, nice, respectful..and all that stuff, but i dunno..not my type i guess. Plus the height thing is kinda weird... were like the same height or he's jus a lil taller. 

          Ima jus stay single..cuz guys are too much problems..always gotta pull some dumb shit on me. Even that one Eric guy...he thought I was too good for him, but I really did like him..and was about to go out with him..then he had to tell me about his ex still coming around and making him feel bad. I kinda wish I didnt change my number the first time...cuz i didnt have his number. The funny thing was I think i scared him a lil....cuz i noticed after I told him this he didnt call for a while and then would get quiet when i bring up his ex. Gosh...guys always get scared when I say this LoLs... I have a problem with females and exgfs...so "if you cheat...i'll break ur car ...you cheat with an exgf...i'll break your face" LoLs..im only JOKING...i think... or maybe not!! hahahaha. I wouldnt take the time to break their car...that would take too long and I might get in trouble...I'd jus have it "disappear". Guys think females cant take cars apart....umm hello!! its much easier to take things apart than to put them together!! haha.

  I'll finish bitching later...talkin on the phone with Belinda.

          I slept most of the day. I had things to do, but as usual, I was lazy. I finally left my house at 10:30 to meet up with Rob, Jon, and Johnny. We had drinks at tea planet then went to wal mart really quick. We picked up some fireworks at Robs and at 12:30 drove up Charleston past the 215. We found an empty lot and we stayed up there for about an hour jus lighting fireworks. I love doing stuff like that...we jus go out and fuck around and have fun. I'm usually the only female, but it never seems to matter, and I always feel comfortable. I've known them for so long that I'm like another one of the guys. I'll point out chicks, make sick jokes, down to do whatever they wanna do, drink as much or what they wanna drink. With girls its different...always gotta be doing girly shit, gettin all dressed up, lookin for guys or parties. I think that's why I don't have many girl friends. Oh well, not a big loss...the guys are koo...they don't bs with me.

         At 3:40am a friend from cali called and asked if I could give them a ride from the Palms to his friends house. I didn't wanna be mean cuz he was koo when I was down in cali, so I said ok. Umm...since he's been in town, I've been avoiding him. I don't know what we were, but there was something in the past. I got down to the Palms and him and his two friends get in, I drove them all the way to northtown...OMG so far!! His friends thanked me and got outta the car and went in the house...and he stayed in. We ended up sittin in the car talking for a while...the whole time in my head I was hella uncomfortable. I was wondering what he thinks we are now...but I wasn't about to bring up the past. I felt really bad, cuz there was something, then after a while I jus stopped talking to him. I'm sooo weird I swear I have problems. I looked at him and damn he looked hella good, but blah....it jus weirds me out...i could barely look at him. I don't think there could ever be "something" there between us again. LoLs Now it's kinda funny, but at the time it wasnt... he kept touchin my arm and then his hand was on my leg and I started movin around tryin to get away from him touching me without being too obvious. I'm so bad...i prolly confused the poor guy hahaha. Finally I kinda made it like I was tired, so he hugged me bye and in my head i kept sayin "please don't kiss me!!" I turned my head to the side so there wasnt a chance for him to make an attempt. Then he said somethin and told me give him another hug....uhh...i have no idea why...but it was kinda akward lols..i turned my head again. He keeps tellin me come down to cali and he'll take me around cuz he didn't get to show me around san diego...he even offers to pay for the ticket. That's really sweet, but I'd feel really weird. I wouldnt want him thinking I want him in that way or expecting something of me. I get weirded out when I'm around guys that I used to "talk" to or guys that have kissed me before. I don't know why!! I usually pretend like nothing happened..and I feel bad, but I jus feel really uncomfortable. Gosh, well that guy leaves sometime this morning, so I prolly wont see him...which is kinda good. He still wants to go to lunch or something..but umm...i don't see that happening =).

           I fell asleep early and now i cant sleep...so gay!! Found out some interesting things tho...LoLs. Gosh, some people really need to stop lying...its soo unattractive!! hahaha. Ooh especially when.........=)...........(secret). I guess it's not hard to pull words outta your ass anymore, when you do it so much...and because you recycle your words and say them to other people. Talkin 'bout they're "losing respect"..ahahaha lols....thats funny!! Look in the fuckin' mirror!! I don't lie..cuz it's pointless, wont get me anywhere, is wrong, and I'd rather be real than fake. Some people seriously need to grow up. These words seem to be floatin' around... selfish, disrespectful, childish, inconsiderate, dirty...and so much more. And why I even talk to this person...I have no idea...maybe it's cuz I'm a fuckin' retard!! I tend to get dumb as soon as they appear. ::shakes head:: don't know what my problem is. I don't know why some people think they have the right to act the way they do, I'm not saying I always act the way I should, but I'm not as fucked up in the head as some people. There's a lot of evil things I could do...which would be soooo funny and entertaining, but whatevers, I'm not gonna be like that.  ::continues to be totally clueless:: LoLs... Most people don't, but should know..I'm very forgetful, until I NEED to remember. Oh well, I hope they know karmas a bitch...haha. (no, im not gonna do anything, it'll come on its own.) Gotta admit tho...pretty smart, lies quite well, and has pretty good game. I thought they were the best so far at hiding stuff...LoLs guess not the greatest...cuz they did make one tiny lil fuck up that changed it. hahaha..maybe I should give that person a few tips or clues to help them out so they don't make the same mistake twice......or maybe not!! *smiles*

(i really dont care if that person is reading this too...maybe they need to know)

          Still have to decide on where I'm going for vacation... maybe cali ...plus a lot of people have been asking me if I wanna go with them, so maybe I'll go a few times this summer.

          I went shopping a lot in the past week... I can't even remember how many times....I've been to Aladdin and Forum about 4 times. Did some shoppin with Justin a few times, then went with Johnny, and Sunday I did a lot with my mom. I don't even want to add up how much I spent...I'm guessing somewhere between $300-$400....I think, I hope it's not more. I need to stop, but it's so hard when different people are always calling and asking if I want to go with them.